


Trapped little secrets (little things we never tell)

by bitterfloof



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Anxious Aziraphale (Good Omens), Aziraphale Needs a Hug (Good Omens), Cute Ending, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Protective Crowley (Good Omens)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-24
Updated: 2020-05-24
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:48:56
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 868
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24361603
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bitterfloof/pseuds/bitterfloof
Summary: Crowley reveals that Aziraphale never had a trial in heaven, Aziraphale doesn't take it too well.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 11
Kudos: 172





	Trapped little secrets (little things we never tell)

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written anything since the beginning of March - mostly between finishing uni and then the whole lockdown debacle. I've not been the most inspired - but blessedly Tumblr provided this lovely little prompt and sparked some inspiration that was left inside me! This is also my first Good Omen fic so be gentle but feel free to give an opinion, they would be much appreciated ^_^
> 
> Tumblr post I got the idea from: https://gingersnapwolves.tumblr.com/post/185800399239/i-know-theres-that-post-going-around-about
> 
> Finally, title is from 'Ghost' by Voxtrot
> 
> Enjoy!

It was a thought that happened to Aziraphale about a few weeks after the whole apoca-wasn't occurred (or didn't depending on who ask was asked) and then the whole being kidnapped to hell posing as Crowley to avoid their executions. He'd had never thought to ask what had happened up in heaven on Crowley's end - he had been too focused on pretending to an accurate Crowley in order to full the armies of hell; which had worked so it was a job well done on his part. 

They were lying in Crowley's bed one night when the very thought had popped into his mind, Crowley was curled up not quite sleeping into his side as Aziraphale flicked through one of his many books. Setting it aside he sat up a little straighter, disturbing Crowley in the process.

"I just had a thought."

"Can it wait until tomorrow?" Crowley asked sleepily which almost made Aziraphale relent, but he went on regardless.

"It's nothing really, I was just thinking, what was my trial like, you know, in heaven? If, as you say, they won't leave us alone forever I'll have to speak to Gabriel eventually and I would like to know what he said," Aziraphale sighed. "Yours was awful, barely a trial really, but I don't know what I expected, they're demons after all . . ."

By then Crowley had sat up too, watching Aziraphale carefully. As it was so late at night and they were alone together Crowley had done away with his shades for the moment and as a result, the look in his eyes was very hard to miss.

"Angel . . . you didn't have a trial."

Aziraphale turned to look at Crowley and the demon instantly regretted his words. The look on Aziraphale's face carried the same look of shock and sadness as it had that day in the pub when Crowley had informed his partner that his beloved bookshop had burned down, it was a look that Crowley really didn't want to ever see again.

Then Aziraphale smiled, turning away from Crowley and looking out across the room. It was a soft smile, but there was nothing happy about it - that much was obvious.

"Oh, I suppose that makes sense. Does make it easier, not as much to remember then. Thank you, my dear."

Whilst his words carried the same form of brightness that his speech normally did, Crowley could clearly see there was pain ebbing at the edges - he looked about a breath away from breaking and it hurt him to see Aziraphale so hurt. Crowley never did like Gabriel, he didn't understand anybody who did, but at that moment he hated him more than he ever had.

Nobody was allowed to hurt Aziraphale.

"Hey, where are you going?"

Aziraphale had stood from the bed, leaving his book behind.

"Nowhere, I'll be back in a jiffy."

Aziraphale exits the room and Crowley watches him go for all of five seconds before standing and following behind his beloved. What could he do to make the situation any better, it was clear that what had been said had deeply (deeply) affected him. Aziraphale was standing in the middle of would normally be classed as a living room but the space was so empty that it was just another room really. In the middle of the big empty space overlooking London, Aziraphale seemed so small, caught up in his own thoughts.

"Aziraphale?" Crowley called gently, he could hear him sigh.

"I always knew they . . . disliked me. But I didn't imagine that . . ." he sighed once more. "Am I really so detestable that they would kill me without a trial?" Aziraphale looked towards Crowley, his eyes were glassy with unshed tears. "Am I?"

Crowley surged forward, taking Aziraphale's face in his hands and looking him right in the eye.

"No, no Angel. You're not. You're so loving and compassionate and gentle. All the things that they could never be," it was true Crowley wasn't the best at being comforting - but when it came to Aziraphale it was a whole other story. After all, you don't stay 6000 years with somebody and not know how to make them feel at least somewhat better. 

"Then . . . why?"

Crowley wished he had an answer but there were somethings he just couldn't say - other than calling heaven a place filled with pencil-pushing bastards who didn't actually give two shits about the earth and its inhabitants, somehow he felt that the statement wouldn't make Aziraphale any better. Instead, he simply pulled Aziraphale into a tight hug, running his hands through the short soft hair on the back of Aziraphale's head.

They stayed like that for a while, Crowley holding Aziraphale and wishing he could take all his worries and fear away. Eventually, they parted.

"Thank you, my dear," Aziraphale says finally, wiping his eyes.

"Is there anything I can do," Crowley asked, thinking about things that made Aziraphale happy - a movie, theatre, lunch together, gentle walks in the park, drinking together, sitting up talking late into the night. He'd do anything to make his angel smile again. 

"Just stay with me," Aziraphale says taking Crowley's hand and holding it tightly.

"Of course Angel," Crowley says, squeezing Aziraphale's hand. "Always."

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading ^_^ Comments and kudos make my day just that bit brighter!
> 
> Feel free to stalk me on Tumblr: bitterfloof.tumblr.com


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